peddiniz

1. Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.
2. Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.
3. Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master
4. Divorce : Future tense of marriage
5. Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".
6. Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage.
7. Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
8. Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
9. Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
10. Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
11. Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.
12. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
13. Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
14. Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."
15. Pessimist :- A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
16. Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
17. Father : A banker provided by nature.
18. Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
19. Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.
20. Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
21. Computer Engineer : One who gets paid for reading such mails......