1. Do Not Interfere In Others' Business Unless Asked
Most of us create our own problems by interfering too often in others’ affairs. We do so because somehow we have convinced ourselves that our way is the best way, our logic is the perfect logic and those who do not conform to our thinking must be criticized and steered to the right direction, our direction. This thinking denies the existence of individuality and consequently the existence of God. God has created each one of us in a unique way. No two human beings can think or act in exactly the same way.
All men or women act the way they do because God within them prompts them that way. There is God to look after everything. Why are you bothered? Mind your own business and you will keep your peace.
2. Forgive And Forget
This is the most powerful aid to peace of mind. We often develop ill feelings inside our heart for the person who insults us or harms us. We nurture grievances. This, in turn, results in loss of sleep, development of stomach ulcers, and high blood pressure. This insult or injury was done once, but nourishing of grievance goes on forever by constantly remembering it. Get over this bad habit. Believe in the justice of God and the doctrine of Destiny. Let Him judge the act of the one who insulted you. Life is too short to waste in such trifles. Forgive, Forget, and march on. Love flourishes in giving and forgiving.
3. Do Not Crave For Recognition
This world is full of selfish people. They seldom praise anybody without selfish motives. They may praise you today because you are in power, but no sooner than you are powerless; they will forget your achievement and will start finding faults in you. Why do you wish to kill yourself in striving for their recognition? Their recognition is not worth the aggravation. Do your duties ethically and sincerely and leave the rest to God, which is Tawakkal.
4. Do Not Be Jealous
We all have experienced how jealousy can disturb our peace of mind. You know that you work harder than your colleagues in the office, but sometimes they get promotions; you do not. You started a business several years ago, but you are not as successful as your neighbor whose business is only one year old. There are several examples like these in everyday life. Should you be jealous? No. Remember everybody's life is shaped by his or her previous Destiny. If you are predestined to be Rich, nothing in the world can stop you. If you are not so destined, no one can help you either. Nothing will be gained by blaming others for your misfortune. Jealousy will not get you anywhere; it will only take away your peace of mind.
5. Change Yourself According To the Environment
If you try to change the environment single-handedly, the chances are you will fail. Instead, change yourself to suit your environment. As you do this, even the environment, which has been unfriendly to you, will mysteriously change and seem congenial and harmonious.
6. Endure What Cannot Be Cured
This is the best way to turn a disadvantage into an advantage.
Every day we face numerous inconveniences, ailments, irritations, and accidents that are beyond our control. If we cannot control them or change them, we must learn to put up with these things. We must learn to endure them cheerfully, thinking, "God wills it so, so be it." God's plans are beyond our comprehension. Believe in it and you will gain in terms of patience, inner strength and will power.
7. Do Not Bite Off More Than You Can Chew
This maxim needs to be remembered constantly. We often tend to take more responsibilities than we are capable of carrying out. This is done to satisfy our ego. Know your limitations. Why take on additional loads that may create more worries? You cannot gain peace of mind by expanding your external activities. Reduce your material engagements and spend time in prayers, introspection and meditation. This will reduce those thoughts in your mind that make you restless. Uncluttered mind will produce greater peace of mind.
8. Meditate Regularly
Meditation calms the mind and gets rid of disturbing thoughts. This is the highest state of peace of mind. Try and experience it yourself. If you meditate earnestly for half an hour everyday, your mind will tend to become peaceful during the remaining twenty-three and half-hours. Your mind will not be easily disturbed as it was before. You would benefit by gradually increasing the period of daily mediation. You may think that this will interfere with your daily work. On the contrary, this will increase your efficiency and you will be able to produce better results in less time.
9. Never Leave the Mind Vacant
An empty mind is the devil's workshop. All evil actions start in the vacant mind. Keep your mind occupied in something positive, something worthwhile. Actively follow a hobby. Do something that holds your interest. You must decide what you value more: money or peace of mind. Your hobby, like social and charitable work , may not always earn you more money, but you will have a sense of fulfillment and achievement. Even when you are resting physically, occupy yourself in healthy reading or mental reciting of God's name.
10. Do Not Procrastinate and Never Regret
Do not waste time in protracted wondering " Should I or shouldn't I?" Days, weeks, months, and years may be wasted in that futile mental debating. You can never plan enough because you can never anticipate all future happenings. Always remember, God has His own plan, too for you. Value you time and do the things that need to be done. It does not matter if you fail the first time. You can learn from your mistakes and succeed the next time.
Sitting back and worrying will lead to nothing. Learn from your mistakes, but do not brood over the past. DO NOT REGRET. Whatever happened was destined to happen only that way. Take it as the Will of God. You do not have the power to alter the course of God's Will. Why cry over spilt milk?
One day, an old man was walking along the beach in the early morning and noticed the tide had washed thousands of starfish up on the shore. Up ahead in the distance he spotted a boy who appeared to be gathering up the starfish, and one by one tossing them back into the ocean.
He approached the boy and asked him why he spent so much energy doing what seemed to be a waste of time.
The boy replied, "If these starfish are left out here like this they will bake in the sun, and by this afternoon they will all be dead."
The old man gazed out as far as he could see and responded, "But, there must be hundreds of miles of beach and thousands of starfish. You can't possibly rescue all of them. What difference is throwing a few back going to make anyway?"
The boy then held up the starfish he had in his hand and replied, "It's sure going to make a lot of difference to this one!"
The boy tossed that starfish into the water. He then looked intently at the old man and said "I will save as many as I can".
The old man had no reply. He was really ashamed of his own attitude. He stood speechless for a while. Then slowly he picked up a starfish and threw it into the water, joining the boy in his efforts. The boy gave him a gentle smile and soon both of them were silently tossing one starfish after another into the water.
Soon, the boy and the old man saw that they were not alone. Other people who had come to the beach for a walk noticed them both working diligently to save the starfish. One by one, people started joining in the effort.
As the sun rose higher in the sky, hundreds of people silently worked to save the starfish. Young people, old people, rich people, poor people all joined hands in the noble task.
Amazingly within a couple of hours, the beach was almost clear of starfish. As the last starfish was thrown into the sea, a thunderous cheer spontaneously arose from the people. Each one of them felt they had done something important, something that made a difference. They cheered and hugged each other. Some of them even exchanged names and numbers and promised to stay in touch.
Nothing is impossible if we work together. But someone needs to be bold enough to take the first step. Many other will follow. Even one person's determination and conviction can change the world.
Are you the ONE??????
Take the first step in CREATING your IDEAL WORLD today and you will see the WORLD will follow??
Wake up from the sleep and slumber??. WAKE UP!!!!!!
Easy is to get a place is someone's address book.
Difficult is to get a place in someone's heart.
Easy is to judge the mistakes of others
Difficult is to recognize our own mistakes.
Easy is to talk without thinking
Difficult is to refrain the tongue.
Easy is to hurt someone who loves us.
Difficult is to heal the wound.
Easy is to forgive others
Difficult is to ask for forgiveness.
Easy is to set rules
Difficult is to follow them.
Easy is to dream every night.
Difficult is to fight for a dream.
Easy is to show victory
Difficult is to assume defeat with dignity.
Easy is to admire a full moon
Difficult to see the other side.
Easy is to stumble with a stone
Difficult is to get up.
Easy is to enjoy life every day
Difficult to give its real value.
Easy is to promise something to someone
Difficult is to fulfill that promise.
Easy is to say we love.
Difficult is to show it every day.
Easy is to criticize others.
Difficult is to improve oneself.
Easy is to make mistakes.
Difficult is to learn from them.
Easy is to weep for a lost love.
Difficult is to take care of it so not to lose it.
Easy is to think about improving.
Difficult is to stop thinking it and put it into action.
Easy is to think bad of others
Difficult is to give them the benefit of the doubt.
Easy is to receive
Difficult is to give.
Easy to read this
Difficult to follow.
Easy is keep the friendship with words
Difficult is to keep it with meanings.
isn't it quite true??
1. QUIT WORRYING: Life has dealt you a blow and all you do is sit and worry. Have you forgotten that I am here to take all your burdens and carry them for you? Or do you just enjoy fretting over every little thing that comes your way?
2. PUT IT ON THE LIST: Something needs done or taken care of. Put it on the list. No, not YOUR list. Put it on MY to-do-list. Let ME be the one to take care of the problem. I can ' t help you until you turn it over to Me. And although My to-do-list is long, I am after all... God. I can take care of anything you put into My hands. In fact, if the truth were ever really known, I take care of a lot of things for you that you never even realize.
3. TRUST ME: Once you ' ve given your burdens to Me, quit trying to take them back. Trust in Me. Have the faith that I will take care of all your needs, your problems and your trials. Problems with the kids? Put them on My list. Problem with finances? Put it on My list. Problems with your emotional roller coaster? For My sake, put it on My list. I want to help you. All you have to do is ask.
4. LEAVE IT ALONE: Don ' t wake up one morning and say, "Well, I ' m feeling much stronger now, I think I can handle it from here." Why do you think you are feeling stronger now? It ' s simple. You gave Me your burdens and I ' m taking care of them. I also renew your strength and cover you in my peace. Don ' t you know that if I give you these problems back, you will be right back where you started? Leave them with Me and forget about them. Just let Me do my job.
5. TALK TO ME: I want you to forget a lot of things. Forget what was making you crazy. Forget the worry and the fretting because you know I ' m in control. But there ' s one thing I pray you never forget. Please, don ' t forget to talk to Me - OFTEN! I love YOU! I want to hear your voice. I want you to include Me in on the things going on in your life. I want to hear you talk about your friends and family. Prayer is simply you having a conversation with Me. I want to be your dearest friend.
6. HAVE FAITH: I see a lot of things from up here that you can ' t see from where you are. Have faith in Me that I know what I ' m doing. Trust Me; you wouldn ' t want the view from My eyes. I will continue to care for you, watch over you, and meet your needs. You only have to trust Me. Although I have a much bigger task than you, it seems as if you have so much trouble just doing your simple part. How hard can trust be?
7. SHARE: You were taught to share when you were only two years old. When did you forget? That rule still applies. Share with those who are less fortunate than you. Share your joy with those who need encouragement. Share your laughter with those who haven ' t heard any in such a long time. Share your tears with those who have forgotten how to cry. Share your faith with those who have none.
8. BE PATIENT: I managed to fix it so in just one lifetime you could have so many diverse experiences. You grow from a child to an adult, have children, change jobs many times, learn many trades, travel to so many places, meet thousands of people, and experience so much. How can you be so impatient then when it takes Me a little longer than you expect to handle something on My to-do-list? Trust in My timing, for My timing is perfect. Just because I created the entire universe in only six days, everyone thinks I should always rush, rush, rush.
9. BE KIND: Be kind to others, for I love them just as much as I love you. They may not dress like you, or talk like you, or live the same way you do, but I still love you all. Please try to get along, for My sake. I created each of you different in some way. It would be too boring if you were all identical. Please, know I love each of your differences.
10. LOVE YOURSELF: As much as I love you, how can you not love yourself? You were created by me for one reason only -- to be loved, and to love in return. I am a God of Love. Love Me. Love your neighbors. But also love yourself. It makes My heart ache when I see you so angry with yourself when things go wrong. You are very precious to me. Don ' t ever forget......
The 5 questions are:
"What are you thinking?"
"Do you love me?"
"Do I look fat?"
"Do you think she is prettier than me?"
"What would you do if I died?"
What makes these questions so bad is that every one is guaranteed to explode into
a major argument and/or divorce if the man does not answer properly.
For example:
1) "What are you thinking?"
The proper answer to this question, of course, is, "I'm sorry if I've been pensive, dear.I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful, caring, thoughtful, intelligent, beautiful woman you are and what a lucky guy I am to have met you."
Obviously, this statement bears no resemblance whatsoever to what the guy was really thinking at the time, which was most likely one of five things:
Baseball
Football
How fat you are.
How much prettier she is than you.
How he would spend the insurance money if you died.
2) "Do you love me?"
The correct answer to this question is, "Yes." For those guys who feel the need to be more elaborate, you may answer, "Yes, dear." Wrong answers include:
I suppose so.
Would it make you feel better if I said yes.
That depends on what you mean by "love".
Does it matter?
Who, me?
3) "Do I look fat?"
The correct male response to this question is to confidently and emphatically state,
"No, of course not" and then quickly leave the room.
Wrong answers include:
I wouldn't call you fat, but I wouldn't call you thin either.
Compared to what?
A little extra weight looks good on you.
I've seen fatter.
Could you repeat the question? I was thinking about your insurance policy.
4) "Do you think she's prettier than me?"
The "she" in the question could be an ex-girlfriend, a passer-by you were staring
at so hard that you almost caused a traffic accident or an actress in a movie you
just saw. In any case, the correct response is, "No, you are much prettier."
Wrong answers include:
Not prettier, just pretty in a different way.
I don't know how one goes about rating such things.
Yes, but I bet you have a better personality.
Only in the sense that she's younger and thinner.
Could you repeat the question? I was thinking about your insurance policy.
5) "What would you do if I died?"
Correct answer: "Dearest love, in the event of your untimely demise, life would
Cease to have meaning for me and I would of course hurl myself under the front
tires of the first Domino's Pizza truck that came my way." This might be the stupidest question of the lot.
1. An Audio Tape Letter
Well my Fiancée sent me a audio tape, when I first saw the tape I thought it was broken, then I looked carefully and realized that it had a little tab, saying "Pull me" I pulled the tab and started to read what was written on the actually magnetic tape. My fiancée had actually written to me on the tape with a gold pen. This really touched my heart, and all I could think of was, what a wonderful, fun and LOVING person she is. I LOVE her to bits, I wish the same to all the romantics out there that share the same thoughts as me and my fiancée do.
2. Message In A Bottle
When you're in a long distance relationship, all you can rely on is letters, cards, emails, and telephone calls. But my boyfriend came up with a creative way to send me a letter. I got a package from him one day and I found a bottle with a letter inside! It was really cute and melted my heart! Who isn't charmed by received a message in a bottle!
3. Dated...
This is not so much an idea, but something that I did for my love. I never believed in love at first sight until I met Micheal. It wasn't quite love at first sight, but following our first date, there were feelings inside me that went far beyond expression. I didn't want to say something that I may regret later, or more likely, something that would scare him away, but I had to let it out or I would simply explode. I sat down and wrote him a letter telling him of my feelings for him. I told him that I thought I was falling in love with him and that I thought he was absolutely wonderful. I put it in an envelope and mailed it to my own home, but with his name on the envelope. It was only a couple weeks later when he expressed that he felt the same feelings about me, and so I pulled the letter out of my drawer and handed it to him. Noticing the post-marked date, he read the letter with complete astonishment, and was totally charmed to know that I had fallen in love with him on our very first date.
4. Secret Admirer
I find that the most romantic gestures take a little time to do. Write a glorious infatuation letter, even better type it to conceal your handwriting. Try to make sure there are no tips to give you away, but put hints in it that would make her think it might be somebody else she knows. Use things you might know about her job, or places she might go, but things other people can also know. You might even scare her by telling her you followed her home. Sign it Your Secret Admirer, and send it to her by mail. Send flowers anonymously. Candy, Poetry, whatever you can think of. I set this up for a month, and when I let on who her secret admirer was, I never felt so gratified. It made her feel good that she thought she was still desirable, and when she found out it was me it made it all the better.
5. A letter hunt
My boyfriend told me that he would leave me a love note on my computer for when I got home. Well, he did just that and more. He sent me running around the house finding these little "clues" to where the real love letter was. After running up and down the stairs, finding clues in the cookie jar, ice cream container, under my pillow, in the bathroom, on the tv, and so on-he led me to the wine cellar in the basement where there sat a dozen roses with yet another "clue" as to where my love letter was. He had taped it to the back of the teddy bear he gave me for x-mas. It was the sweetest thing in the world even though I felt silly running through the house like I did.
6. A Single Rose Love Letter
Who says that flowers are only for girls? Guys love them too. I bought a beautiful rose for my boyfriend and plucked almost all of the petals off of it. Attached to each petal, I wrote one sentence on a small piece of paper (rolled up) telling him how much he means to me. I placed the petals face up so he couldn't see the messages. When he opened the box, he saw the left over plucked rose, a small note explaining what's behind each petal, and the petals underneath. I can honestly say that the reciever will cherish that gift forever. :o) My boyfriend did, and right after he confessed his love for me. To this day, he still takes out the dried rose petals to read each note that explains how much I admire and love him.
7. Say it with their name
Send your partner roses according to how many letters there name has. For example: "manny". You would buy 5 red roses and with each rose you would write a message starting with the first letter of their name. For example M: My love. You will never imagine how much I love you. Then for the second rose you would write: All that I ever have wanted is you and only you. then you would finish until you get to the letter Y. Before writing the note you must underline the first letter of every message. It will spell out his /her name. Then leave it where he/she will see it or just have it sent.
8. Floating love letter
Save the next empty wine bottle, the next time you surprise your partner with that bubble bath, write a love letter and stick it in the bottle, cork it and float it in the bath water : )
9. Love Notes
I love leaving little love notes around the house, but you want to make sure that you leave them where your love one will find them. Two ways this can be done.
(1) buy magnetic letters (bookstores sell) and place them on the refig., they are bound to go there sooner or later.
(2) use a soap bar and write your romantic message on the bathroom mirror. It won't do damage to mirror and is easy to get off with a little water.
10. Say it in a BIG way!
The other day I made a large envelope and a large note that said, "I love you in the biggest way!" I even went out on the Internet to download pictures of stamps and blew them up in size. Then I had the apartments where she lives call her to the office to pick up an "important" letter...
11. Book of Love
This is something I did for my boyfriend, and he loved it! I thought of My ten favorite things about him, then wrote a letter about each one and how much it meant to me. I put all the letters (after I'd spent tons of time perfecting and decorating them) together into a little book, and give it to him for our anniversary. Big success!!
12. Letter a day...
If your loved one is going away for vacation or a short trip, take a pink colored notepad and for each day that he's gone write a separate love letter, so that he can read one everyday and be close to you. (I tried it-- and it worked better than I thought!)
13. Love Letter Ideas
I like to send my boyfriend a letter (snail mail) every week. However, I want every letter to be as new and exciting as for him as the first, so I try to be creative. Some ideas:
- send a letter in a bottle (be extra careful with the packaging so it won't break)
-write a letter on the back of a 100 piece jigsaw puzzle, then take it apart and let them put it together
-instead of sending a written letter, send a video cassette of yourself telling everything you want your special person to know.
14. Love Letter Ideas
I've found that one way to easily make an ordinary letter or package more special for somebody, is to decorate the package or envelope that you're sending. When one of my loves sent me a teddy bear, she lined the inside of the box with gift wrapping paper, and I still cherish that box to this day. If you've got a letter you wanna decorate, and you're not a good artist, then get some stickers. Too many of us forget about stickers after about grade school, but you can attach a cute or lovable sticker to anything at all, and whatever it touches will become special. A lot of restaurants and stores will have sticker dispensers that have those shiny, metallic stickers, they are superb. But don't just get the envelope, hit the letter itself, and be sure to perfume those pages. Perfumed pages are incredibly sensual. A good way to accomplish this is to put perfume on your wrist before you start writing. As your wrist moves across the paper, it'll be scented. Yet another thing you can do to make a letter more romantic is to write something on the flap, so the first thing your love sees when they open the envelope is an, "I love you" or something else. Before they even begin reading, they'll already be smitten with love.
15. In A Different Language
Write your loved one a long, romantic, handwritten letter in a different language (friends come awfully handy if you don't know that much). Give it to him/her with something you treasure (in my case, he gave me his lucky pen). They'll have a memorable time getting the letter translated, and they'll be inspired to do the same. *smile*
16. Laundry Surprise
If your loved one does your laundry, write a love letter and leave it in a pocket. On laundry day he/she will find it while checking for forget me's. Make sure to write his/her name on it so he/she will read it, not just toss it in the waste.
17. Word Power
When sending your loved one a card or letter, handwrite a word find puzzle on the envelope with the words "I Love You" hidden and ask her to find the hidden phrase. Nice little treat!
18. A Simple Letter of Love
A simple letter to show them how you feel usually makes them smile. My boyfriend and I are in high school and we were kind of fighting. Well, one day I went all day without seeing him at all. When school got out he was waiting for me by the doors and he handed me a letter and told me to open it. I opened it and all the way down the paper it said, "I love you." Then at the very bottom it said, "Hope this makes up for the times when I didn't say I love you or it didn't seem like I did. I'll always love you a million times more than what you think." I looked up and he kissed me right in front of his friends and sister. It was so sweet! See what a simple letter can do to make things better?
19. I Love You Blanket
Find out his favorite colors and make him a blanket preferably fleece and on one side using felt letters write something like "cover you in kisses" or "I Love you" or "Wrapping you in my love" or something like that. I'm giving it to my BF for christmas I hope it goes well!
20. Rescue Me!
I did this for my boyfriend and I's 1st anniversary, He loved it. OK, I got a big glass bottle with a cork on top. You glue sand on the out side, make sure that it looks like the bottle has been laying on the sand for a very long time. and glue shells,sea weed etc. Then some how get some one to draw you. (make sure you like) Then write a nice letter about how you two got together and how you feel now. Then roll the papers up and place then in the bottle. Oh an extra tip.. drop some perfume on the cork. Enjoy!
21. A Letter To Remember
Before your wedding write a letter to your husband to be and have them write one to you. Write about anything. But, focus on your relationship with that person. Then put both letters in a safe deposit box. On your 25th anniversary exchange letters that you wrote to each other.
22. A Ransom Note
Champagne, games, and roses are nice but can get very boring after a while. Instead, get creative and do something off the wall. My girlfriend has this stuffed animal that she adores and keeps on her bed. So I decided to kidnap the stuffed animal making a ransom note from cutting letters out of the news paper.In the letter it said " give me a McDonalds cheeseburger and a six pack of beer or your stuffed pig is pork." Then I took a picture of it on a plate with an apple by it and a fork and knife by the edge of the plate. I then placed the ransom letter and picture on her door. Of course when she saw it she new it was me but we had a fun time with it. She would make playful and sarcastic comments and of course I played back. Needless to say I gave the stuffed animal back making myself look like the hero and she rewarded me with a nite of love. However, your mate must have a good sense of hummor or you might spend the nite on the couch.
23. Candy Bar Card
For my boyfriend's birthday, I got a big poster board and I wrote him a letter using candy bars. It said things like you're better than the Three Musketeers, and meet me at 5th Avenue so I can see your Whatchamacalit. Then at the end I put little hugs and kisses. He absolutely loved it and still has it.
24. Covered In Love
Write a surprise love letter to your significant other on a bed sheet (the one you use to cover up with).
25. Butterflies
I was getting ready to go out with an old girlfriend I had not seen in five years. I was waiting for her to show up at my apartment and was very nervous. When she arrived I couldn't believe how beautiful she was, more than I had remembered. She looked wonderful. Anyway we had a spectacular evening of dinner and dancing. After she left that evening I couldn't stop thinking about her so I decided send her a letter the following week. The letter had small stickers of butterflies I had placed all over it with a message that read "These are the butterflies you gave me last Friday when I heard you walking up the steps to my apartment. I thought you might like them back." She absolutely loved it!!
26. An Overlooked I Love You
Once, when my boyfriend and I were having a rough time on a special day, I cut out nine small paper hearts, wrote one letter of "I LOVE YOU!" on each, and colored them pink and red. I put the hearts in an envelope with a sheet of paper. On the paper I had made outlines of the hearts (from when I colored them) with nine overlooked reasons why I love him, one in each.
27. Message In A Bottle
For our one year anniversary, I wanted to do something special for my boyfriend, but I wasn't sure what to do. Then, while shopping at a craft store, I came upon a beautiful, blue bottle with a cork. Inspired by the recent movie, "Message in a Bottle", I wrote my boyfriend a three page letter reviewing the past year, and expressing my everlasting love for him. Then I tied the letter with a ribbon, put it in the bottle, put the cork in tightly, and then dated it. When I give it to him, he won't be allowed to open it...he will have to wait until the following year. A year later, as he opens the bottle from the previous year, he will be presented with another message in a bottle. Hopefully, we will be together long enough so that he will eventually have many, many bottles!! :)
28. Being There For Your Love!
Write your love a love letter using kiddie stickers that say things like "terrific" or "top notch" or the like. It's a colorful way to spice up an ordinary love letter and will be sure to make his/her day that you put in the extra time.
7th Feb Rose Day
8th Feb Propose Day
9th Feb Chocolate Day
10th Feb Teddy Day
11th Feb Promise Day
12th Feb Kiss Day
13th Feb Hug Day
14th Feb Valentine's Day
15th Feb Slap Day
16th Feb Kick Day
17th Feb Perfume Day
18th Feb Flirting Day
19th Feb Confession Day
20th Feb Missing Day
21st Feb Break Up
Fine
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
Five Minutes
If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour.Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
Nothing
This is the calm before the storm. This means something,and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothingusually end in fine.
Go Ahead
This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
Loud Sigh
This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are anidiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)
That's Okay
This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hardbefore deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
Thanks
A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome.
Don't worry about it,
I got it
Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3.Then you RUN!
Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies - Aristotle
Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage - Lao Tzu
My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
My love as deep; the more I give to thee,
The more I have, for both are infinite -William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways -Elizabeth Barrett Browning
Young love is a flame; very pretty, often very hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. The love of the older and disciplined heart is as coals, deep-burning, unquenchable -Henry Ward Beecher
Age does not protect you from love.But love,to some extent,protects you from age
-Anais Nin
Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other but in looking outward in the same direction -Antoine de Saint-Exupery
Love has no desire but to fulfill itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires;
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully -Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet
The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart -Helen Keller
Love does not dominate;it cultivates -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Love makes your soul crawl out from its hiding place -Zora Neale Hurston
Love is life. All, everything that I understand, I understand only because I love. Everything is, everything exists, only because I love -Leo Tolstoy
Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it, and it darts away -Dorothy Parker
I have learned not to worry about love; but to honor its coming with all my heart.
-Alice Walker
I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way
than this: where I does not exist nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep -Pablo Neruda, "Love Sonnet XVII"
The carpenter I hired to help me restore an old farm house had just finished a rough first day on the job. A flat tire had caused him to miss an hour of work, his electric saw quit, and now his ancient pick-up truck refused to start.
As I drove him home, he sat in stony silence. When we arrived he invited me in to meet his family. As we walked to the front door, he paused briefly at a small tree, touching the tips of the branches with both hands. When opening the door he underwent an amazing transformation. His tanned face was wreathed in smiles; he hugged his two small children and gave his wife a kiss.
Afterward he walked me to the car. We passed by the tree and my curiosity got the better of me. I asked him about what I had seen him do earlier.
"Oh, that's my trouble tree," he replied. "I know I can't help having troubles on the job, but one thing's for sure, they don't belong in the house with my wife and children. So, I just hang them on the tree when I come home in the evening and then I just pick them up again in the morning."
"Funny thing, though," he smiled, "when I come out in the morning to pick 'em up, there ain't nearly as many as I remembered hanging there the night before."
A voyaging ship was wrecked during a storm at sea and only two of the men on it were able to swim to a small, desert like island. The two survivors, not knowing what else to do, agreed that they had no other recourse but to pray to God. However, to find out whose prayer was more powerful, they agreed to divide the territory between them and stay on opposite sides of the island.
The first thing they prayed for was food. The next morning, the first man saw a fruit-bearing tree on his side of the land, and he was able to eat its fruit. The other man's parcel of land remained barren.
After a week, the first man was lonely and he decided to pray for a wife. The next day, another ship was wrecked, and the only
survivor was a woman who swam to his side of the land. On the other side of the island, there was nothing.
Soon the first man prayed for a house, clothes, more food. The next day, like magic, all of these were given to him. However, the
second man still had nothing.
Finally, the first man prayed for a ship, so that he and his wife would leave the island. In the morning, he found a ship docked at
his side of the island.
The first man boarded the ship with his wife and decided to leave the second man on the island. He considered the other man unworthy to receive God's blessings, since none of his prayers had been answered. As the ship was about to leave, the first man heard a voice from heaven booming, "Why are you leaving your companion on the island?"
"My blessings are mine alone, since I was the one who prayed for them," the first man answered. "His prayers were all unanswered
and so he does not deserve anything."
"You are mistaken!" the voice rebuked him. "He had only one prayer, which I answered. If not for that, you would not have received any of my blessings."
"Tell me," the first man asked the voice, "What did he pray for that I should owe him anything?" "He prayed that all your prayers be answered."
For all we know, our blessings are not the fruits of our prayers alone, but those of another praying for us.
Believe in your heart that something wonderful is about to happen. Love your life.
Believe in your own powers, and your own potential, and in your own innate goodness.
Wake every morning with the awe of just being alive.
Discover each day the magnificent, awesome beauty in the world.
Explore and embrace life in yourself and in everyone you see each day.
Reach within to find your own specialness.
Amaze yourself and rouse those around you to the potential of each new day.
Don't be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect; this is the essence of your humanity. Let those who love you help you. Trust enough to be able to take.
Look with hope to the horizon of today, for today is all we truly have.
Live this day well. Let a little sun out as well as in.
Create your own rainbows. Be open to all your possibilities; all possibilities and Miracles.
Always believe in Miracles.
It was probably the April of 1974. Bangalore was getting warm and gulmohars were blooming at the IISc campus. I was the only girl in my postgraduate department and was staying at the ladies' hostel. Other girls were pursuing research in different departments of Science. I was looking forward to going abroad to complete a doctorate in computer science. I had been offered scholarships from Universities in the US. I had not thought of taking up a job in India.
One day, while on the way to my hostel from our lecture-hall complex, I saw an advertisement on the notice board. It was a standard job-requirement notice from the famous automobile company Telco (now Tata Motors). It stated that the company required young, bright engineers, hardworking and with an excellent academic background, etc.
At the bottom was a small line: "Lady candidates need not apply."
I read it and was very upset. For the first time in my life I was up against gender discrimination.
Though I was not keen on taking up the job, I saw it as a challenge. I had done extremely well in academics, better than most of my male peers. Little did I know then that in real life academic excellence is not enough to be successful.
After reading the notice I went fuming to my room. I decided to inform the topmost person in Telco's management about the injustice the company was perpetrating. I got a postcard and started to write, but there was a
problem: I did not know who headed Telco.
I thought it must be one of the Tatas. I knew JRD Tata was the head of the Tata Group; I had seen his pictures in newspapers (actually, Sumant Moolgaokar was the company's chairman then). I took the card, addressed it to JRD and started writing. To this day I remember clearly what I wrote.
"The great Tatas have always been pioneers. They are the people who started the basic infrastructure industries in India, such as iron and steel,chemicals, textiles and locomotives. They have cared for higher education in India since 1900 and they were responsible for the establishment of the Indian Institute of Science. Fortunately, I study there. But I am surprised how a company such as Telco is discriminating on the basis of gender."
I posted the letter and forgot about it. Less than 10 days later, I received a telegram stating that I had to appear for an interview at Telco's Pune facility at the company's expense. I was taken aback by the telegram. My hostel mate told me I should use the opportunity to go to Pune free of cost and buy them the famous Pune saris for cheap! I collected Rs 30 each from everyone who wanted a sari. When I look back, I feel like laughing at the reasons for my going, but back then they seemed good enough to make the trip.
It was my first visit to Pune and I immediately fell in love with the city.
To this day it remains dear to me. I feel as much at home in Pune as I do in Hubli, my hometown. The place changed my life in so many ways. As directed, I went to Telco's Pimpri office for the interview.
There were six people on the panel and I realised then that this was serious business.
"This is the girl who wrote to JRD," I heard somebody whisper as soon as I entered the room. By then I knew for sure that I would not get the job. The realisation abolished all fear from my mind, so I was rather cool while the interview was being conducted.
Even before the interview started, I reckoned the panel was biased, so I told them, rather impolitely, "I hope this is only a technical interview."
They were taken aback by my rudeness, and even today I am ashamed about my attitude. The panel asked me technical questions and I answered all of them.
Then an elderly gentleman with an affectionate voice told me, "Do you know why we said lady candidates need not apply? The reason is that we have never employed any ladies on the shop floor. This is not a co-ed college; this is a factory. When it comes to academics, you are a first ranker throughout. We appreciate that, but people like you should work in research laboratories."
I was a young girl from small-town Hubli. My world had been a limited place.
I did not know the ways of large corporate houses and their difficulties, so I answered, "But you must start somewhere, otherwise no woman will ever be able to work in your factories."
Finally, after a long interview, I was told I had been successful. So this was what the future had in store for me. Never had I thought I would take up a job in Pune. I met a shy young man from Karnataka there, we became good friends and we got married.
It was only after joining Telco that I realized who JRD was: the uncrowned king of Indian industry. Now I was scared, but I did not get to meet him till I was transferred to Bombay. One day I had to show some reports to Mr Moolgaokar, our chairman, who we all knew as SM. I was in his office on the first floor of Bombay House (the Tata headquarters) when, suddenly JRD walked in. That was the first time I saw "appro JRD". Appro means "our" in Gujarati. This was the affectionate term by which people at Bombay House called him.
I was feeling very nervous, remembering my postcard episode. SM introduced me nicely, "Jeh (that's what his close associates called him), this young woman is an engineer and that too a postgraduate.
She is the first woman to work on the Telco shop floor." JRD looked at me. I was praying he would not ask me any questions about my interview (or the postcard that preceded it).
Thankfully, he didn't. Instead, he remarked. "It is nice that girls are getting into engineering in our country. By the way, what is your name?"
"When I joined Telco I was Sudha Kulkarni, Sir," I replied. "Now I am Sudha Murthy." He smiled and kindly smile and started a discussion with SM. As for me, I almost ran out of the room.
After that I used to see JRD on and off. He was the Tata Group chairman and I was merely an engineer. There was nothing that we had in common. I was in awe of him.
One day I was waiting for Murthy, my husband, to pick me up after office hours. To my surprise I saw JRD standing next to me. I did not know how to react. Yet again I started worrying about that postcard. Looking back, I realise JRD had forgotten about it. It must have been a small incident for him, but not so for me.
"Young lady, why are you here?" he asked. "Office time is over." I said, "Sir, I'm waiting for my husband to come and pick me up." JRD said, "It is getting dark and there's no one in the corridor.
I'll wait with you till your husband comes." I was quite used to waiting for Murthy, but having JRD waiting alongside made me extremely uncomfortable. I was nervous. Out of the corner of my eye I looked at him. He wore a simple white pant and shirt. He was old, yet his face was glowing. There wasn't any air of superiority about him. I was thinking, "Look at this person. He is a chairman, a well-respected man in our country and he is waiting for the sake of an ordinary employee."
Then I saw Murthy and I rushed out. JRD called and said, "Young lady, tell your husband never to make his wife wait again."
In 1982 I had to resign from my job at Telco. I was reluctant to go, but I really did not have a choice. I was coming down the steps of Bombay House after wrapping up my final settlement when I saw JRD coming up. He was absorbed in thought. I wanted to say goodbye to him, so I stopped. He saw me and paused.
Gently, he said, "So what are you doing, Mrs Kulkarni?" (That was the way he always addressed me.)
"Sir, I am leaving Telco."
"Where are you going?" he asked.
"Pune, Sir. My husband is starting a company called Infosys and I'm shifting to Pune."
"Oh! And what will you do when you are successful."
"Sir, I don't know whether we will be successful."
"Never start with diffidence," he advised me. "Always start with confidence.
When you are successful you must give back to society. Society gives us so much; we must reciprocate. I wish you all the best."
Then JRD continued walking up the stairs. I stood there for what seemed like a millennium. That was the last time I saw him alive. Many years later I met Ratan Tata in the same Bombay House, occupying the chair JRD once did. I told him of my many sweet memories of working with Telco. Later, he wrote to me, "It was nice hearing about Jeh from you. The sad part is that he's not alive to see you today."
I consider JRD a great man because, despite being an extremely busy person, he valued one postcard written by a young girl seeking justice. He must have received thousands of letters everyday. He could have thrown mine away, but he didn't do that. He respected the intentions of that unknown girl, who had neither influence nor money, and gave her an opportunity in his company. He did not merely give her a job; he changed her life and mindset forever.
Close to 50 per cent of the students in today's engineering colleges are girls. And there are women on the shop floor in many industry segments. I see these changes and I think of JRD. If at all time stops and asks me what I want from life, I would say I wish JRD were alive today to see how the company we started has grown. He would have enjoyed it wholeheartedly.
My love and respect for the House of Tata remains undiminished by the passage of time. I always looked up to JRD. I saw him as a role model for his simplicity, his generosity, his kindness and the care he took of his employees. Those blue eyes always reminded me of the sky; they had the same vastness and magnificence.
About the Author:
Sudha Murthy is a widely published writer and chairperson of the Infosys Foundation involved in a number of social development initiatives in India.
Infosys chairman Narayan Murthy is her husband.
Tatagroup is one of the largest companies in India and Infosys is one of the largest software business in India.
